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I think it comes down to age and expectation. When one is no longer a kid, in love with the idea of romance and a big love, if you have a mutual sexual interest, why delay things for a number of dates? If you are here to find love (and astoundingly some are), then your trajectory will be different from somebody who is an avowed swinger. Swingers are usually enormously respectful, they seek to give and receive pleasure, but there is no pretence that "love" is the goal. I think you are right in that some see this site as a shortcut that it will never be. On the other hand, if geography permits, it can be used for what it says on the tin. Thinking is hugely under-rated!
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10/14/2018 11:17 am |
We’re here to find a sexual friendship. If I wanted to be “ courted” I,d join P.O.F.
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I think in both scenarios men( and maybe some women) just want to get laid as soon as physically possible, it's how they approach it that maybe differs. This site promotes "join now, get laid tonight" and I think most men are under the illusion that that is going to happen and they can just say "hey, fancy a fuck?" and boom! Bobs your Uncle, fanny's your aunt!! as we all know it's more than likely NOT going to happen ... but on a vanilla site,,, they promote friendship, relationships and love... so it feels more like a "courting" scenario, and they will approach women in a different way... either sincerely or with a lot of bullshit. There are men on here who want NSA, FB, FWB, yada yada,,, and are also on a vanilla site seeking "the one"
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I can be romantic, but that comes when romance is approriate. I meet a woman for our 1st time, a public place, maybe incognito if she is shy, but usually for a brunch, or lunch, my preference. AND, if we hit it off to go beyond that 1st meeting, then I can delve into whether she is looking for a hookup (many are ya know & have no interest in a relationship) or wants more. AND, If I find her interesting enough to want more too, then I roll out the romance package. But I dont romance every gal I meet, in fact prob less than 10%, because most of the gals I meet fall into that 'casual dating & funn catagory. I recently met a gal, that decided she had fallen in LOVE with me, before we had even met once, and not really believing that of her, we did meet (I had my missgivings tho & shoulda listen to those feelings closer) and OMG, yeah, we had funn, twice in 2& 1/2 days, but all she could do beside the bedtime was tell me how much she LOVED me, hell, she didnt know anything about aside from my profile, nor I her. Needless to say, I gave it a 2nd date try, even tried a little romance, but it only got worse, and when I told her I didnt think we were meant for each other, she began threatening me by staling me, phone, online, and in person! I finally had to call the local PD, and they reported to me I waasnt her FIRST guy to report such, and they went and had ANOTHER talk with her ! Remains to be seen if that stops her tho.
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10/14/2018 12:29 pm |
Not really sure. Casual moves a lot faster for sure.
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I believe it is no difference in between casual relationship and dating, it is all starts from casual and just progressed. Yes, you right site promotes get laid right away, but life doesn't work that way, we are all have buttons and limitations. In my life all relationship starts with casual date and if moon is right than moving to real dates, but it is no time frame it can takes days or years, it is up to your feeling.
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Ok..just for clarification..I've picked women up in bars and had sex with them that night. Just not the norm for me. And it hasn't happened in quite a while. For me, whether it's here, or years back when I was on the Match...It's not about whether I can get laid tonight. For the ladies, you really need to know who your going out with, but trust me. There are some crazy ladies out there too. LOL I like to get to know someone , at least a little, before we're doin the horizontal bop. " I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx
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